Did I tell you guys....

about the funny experience I had ordering a pork shank in a chi chi restaurant in Boston? The discussion about undercooked risotto made me think about uninformed servers who try to be helpful but impart completely inaccurate information.

So here's what happened. (It still makes me laugh when I think about it.)
Server: What would you like to order?
Me: I'll try the pork shank.
Server: And how would you like that cooked?
Me: Cooked for three or four hours until it's falling off the bone.
Server: Chuckle. No, really. I highly recommend you order it medium.
Me: Uhm...(fumbling through menu to find out if there is another pork dish he may think I want to order)...this one here, the braised pork shank.
Server: Yes, it's the only pork entree we have. Medium is the way to go.
Me: Okay fine. Bring it to me that way!
Server: You wont be sorry!

I knew full well that it had been braised ahead of time and would be just heated up for me, which is exactly how it was done. It wasn't worth ordering anyway though, because it tasted like it had been cooked a few days prior and cooled outside of the braising liquid. Very dry. Certainly not pink in the middle though!

What are your funny, clueless server stories?

Note: This is not to take anything away from the many, many very informed, helpful, capable servers out there who truly do a great job in making appropriate recommendations...

[Jenise]

Oh gosh, I don't have a story that good, but just last night we dined--a business-related dinner--at the new Anthony's Hearthfire restaurant that opened up about two months ago. Anthony's is a west coast seafood chain that's now opening steak joints nearby, at least if Everett and Bellingham Washington are any indication.

Outside the restaurant was a sign saying "It's here! Copper River Salmon!"

Waiter: Can I help you with anything on the menu?
Bob: The copper river salmon, it's only prepared the one way or do you have a special?
Waiter: The Copper River isn't coming in until next week.
Bob: Then why is it on the menu?
Waiter: It's on the menu?
Bob: Yes, right here.
Waiter: Well that's frozen.
Bob: Says right here (he points to his menu) "fresh".
Waiter: Can't be, because the fish doesn't leave Alaska until next week. They haven't eaten enough shrimp yet.
Jenise: The first plane load of Copper River salmon landed in Seattle on Monday.
Bob: And it says right here, "fresh".
Waiter: Let me go check. (he leaves and returns) You're right!
Les (who knows the first fish will be sockeye but just wants to play with the guy): Is it sockeye or king?
Waiter: It's dark red.

Oh my. I just nearly spewed tea all over my keyboard!

Great thread!

[Jenise]

Ah, I remember my favorite "clueless server story":

In Anchorage, Alaska, at a brewery/restaurant, I ordered a spinach salad. "Hold the egg," I said--it came dusted with chopped egg.
The salad arrives and the dressing has a slimey thickness to it and as soon as I taste it, I realize why: raw egg white. Egads! So I flag down the waitress.

Me: I believe there's raw egg white in this dressing, and I had you hold the egg topping because I don't eat eggs. I'll have the house salad.
Her: There's no egg in the dressing.
Me: Well, I'm pretty sure there is and I'd like something else--I can't eat this.
Her: There's no egg in the dressing, it's my favorite salad.
Me: Well, something tastes like raw egg to me, and I don't care for the texture. I can't eat it. Will you bring me a house salad?
Her: Well, I'll go ask the chef. [she leaves and returns] The chef says yes there's raw egg in the dressing, but he says you can't taste it.
Me, incredulous: I could TOO taste it! That's why we're talking about it.
Her: But he says you can't. Do you still want something else?

She never really heard a word I said.

That is a classic, Jenise! Incredible. Your salmon story was funny too!

I'm like you on the egg thing. I can't stand that raw egg taste. Don't know how people eat steak tartare...all I can taste is raw egg yolk.

%^)

... on sunny side up eggs for breakfast, lunch, and dinner !

Clink !

%^)