Jo Ann, I've gotten this question so many times I may write another article on it.
I absolutely detest group tours and will never go on another one. Aside from the fact that I don't like being herded around like a cow, I think being in a group isolates you from everything you want to interact with. They also tend to arrange meals around the lowest common denominator so your odds of getting actual local food are very low.
Years ago I started finding people who would help you plan a trip, make reservations for you, etc for a fee. This seems to have evolved into a more sophisticated industry and we found a wonderful example in Hanoi. We somehow discovered a company called Custom Vietnam Travel and wound up working with a woman named Liliana Pham. Through emails and phone calls we arranged a trip from one end of the country to the other involving touring, meals, bicycle trips, boat trips, internal plane trips and private guides and drivers. (You do need some help navigating a country like Vietnam.) The guides (really Vietnamese buddies) were with us from morning until sometime in the afternoon most days, and then we were on our own for the rest of the day and dinner. They would recommend favorite restaurants, but we made the final decisions. The restaurants they picked for lunch (which was included in the price) were excellent. We had an itinerary but we often changed it on the fly, wanting to see what a grocery store was selling rather than seeing another temple. They even gave us a company cellphone so we could contact someone anytime in case we got in trouble. The hotels were all good and extremely well located and even quiet, which is a trick in Vietnam.
The entire bill for just under two weeks of private guides, hotels, internal flights, boat trips, bike trips, etc, etc for both of us was $2,600. You can't stay home for that little. Once you get there Vietnam is the biggest bargain I've ever seen in many decades of traveling.
Liliana is at
liliana@customvietnamtravel.com or at +84 437185750, cellphone: +84 1682 844 129. We met her in Hanoi. She is great and I can't recommend her enough. If you use services like Skype you can call Vietnam for about 3 cents/minute.
BTW, we wound up first in Singapore because we found a nonstop from San Fran to there. We decided to stay in Singapore for several days to recover, get used to the time change and see another country. It was a great decision. That's a wonderful place to visit and it's a couple hour flight from there to Vietnam.
If you want more detailed information or to talk about this send me a message and we'll work it out. You should definately go.