...and was trying to decide whether to go back to bed or not. I have much to do today, and the 30 lb box of pork neck bones was on the counter, thawing, and two 30 qt stock pots were on the stove ready to receive them once they're browned. Should I get started on that demi glace or not? Hmmm..."Self," I said, "have a V8, sit down and play with Tammy Faye for a few minutes, and then decide." So I shuffled to the refrigerator and opened the door.
CRASH! There are two shelves on the inside of my refrigerator door that hold condiments. The one that holds the tall bottles had sheared off on one side, and on the floor were, among other things: beer, sweet pickle relish, Indian mango pickle, chile garlic sauce, anchovies, Dijon mustard, oyster sauce and horseradish. Broken. Glass had scattered about five feet in every direction, and there was shit everywhere. Smelly shit. Sticky shit. It looked like a Superfund site.
So much for going back to bed.