Hell's Kitchen (not the TV show)

Back from visiting my parents. I love them dearly, they are great hosts, but God I (and Betsy) hate cooking in their house.

The kitchen itself has plenty of room, lots of counterspace, but the lights are set so they don't really illuminate the workspace. But that's minor. What kills me is the equipment and staples.

Knives: cheap, old, and dull.

Pans- the frying pans and saute pans are all non-stick, of the low end variety (T-Fal would be an improvement). The deeper pans are uniformly thin metal. I don't know if there is a single pan that can go from stovetop to oven (cheap plastic handles). Most have been around since my childhood.

Other equipment- Dad got rid of salad spinner because "not enough room" (yet they find space for about 15 bins of Christmas stuff). Winged corkscews with no helix. All plastic spatulas etc (I guess all the non-stick).

Staples- the "pure" olive oil was previously rancid (not this time, there was still decent EV oil from our last visit). The balsamic is Progresso (I reduced for Betsy's Brussels sprouts, a slight improvement, but nothing like good vinegar). Salt is Morton's etc. No pepper grinder. Not a staple but my dad buys nuts, cereals or snacks in big containers, and then keeps till stale (they notice it's now stale, but eat rather than waste). Actually this is less bothersome than equipment, we can buy what we need (though it leads to a parental affront- "our oil isn't good enough? ")

It's just frustrating - while my parents are Depression children, and exceptionally frugal, they have no issue with spending lots of money on furniture, china, tours, etc. Yet for some reason food (which they like!) is always reduced to the cheapest pan or oil one can find. They have at least a dozen pieces of furniture worth more than every piece of kitchen equipment combined. It's only for a few days, but the dull knives in particular drive me to distraction. We enjoy our visits, but take a deep breath before each meal prep.

So, how about you? Do you have to sometimes endure poorly equipped kitchens trying to cook for those you love?

Do you have to sometimes endure poorly equipped kitchens trying to cook for those you love?

It's probably frustrating for anyone has a very advanced hobby to deal with mere mortals. But, I'm sure it's also frustrating for them to deal with us!

In addition to all the salt, pan issues you mention, one of my aunts used to frustrate me by buying the 'light' olive oil, which imparted no flavor whatsoever.

My mother has spices that she bought in the 1900's and they are all the same color (grey) and in the same container as when they first arrived (the little glass jars with plastic caps and the names of each stenciled on the front). In her house, $100 buys a set of whatever you need. I would never tell her that I have spent more than that on a single pan. Whenever I cook for her, I precook most things and bring my own pans, herbs and knives. It makes me feel like a snob but, hey....

I precook most things and bring my own pans, herbs and knives. It makes me feel like a snob but, hey....

Nice. I have been known to bring all food and pantry items (especially oil and salt) but pans and knives, bravo for you!

I'm quite fortunate that pretty much everyone in my family is really into good food and cooks very well so most of the time I'm not required to cook (and get a lot more out of just following instructions in the kitchen and learning).

The kitchen I have at my place in CT is certainly bigger than the ones my parents or uncles/aunts have, but pretty much every one has a gas stove and in most cases better equipment (my wok and kadai are certainly nowhere near as big or well seasoned as my mum's or grandmother's). And quite often they also have better spices and fresher/more varied ingredients available than what I have here. Now I'm kind of glad none of them ever have to come up here to cook, as they'd probably feel pretty constrained.

Yikes, I didn't even want to get into the dried spices. My parents have only been in this house 6 years, but think they moved most of the spices from NC.
It's not the constraints themselves, but the fact they seem (to me) so unnecessary, as they are reasonably affluent. I've made meals at friends' homes with tiny gallery kitchens (I had one myself pre-Betsy) where equipment was scant, but I could see why.
The scariest part was when my mom (who is on coumadin for a blood clot) insisted on peeling potatoes with a dull knife. I kept car keys in my hand for anticipated trip to ER.

Over the years I bought for my parents, pans, knives and other utensils, a pepper mill, wine glasses, etc. Some they used and much they did not but it was there when I came in and I could use it. Had to sharpen the knives every visit. Also, I started making a run to a nicer grocery on the fist day of every visit (after I took an inventory) so I had the minimum I needed for meals. Over time my parents got use to it. Not much I could do about the lack of counter space or the underpowered vent hood.

Dale - it seems like Santa could help your parents out.

I've thought about the gift idea, but it's a bit like giving Betsy wine- she'd know it wasn't really intended for her. I better stick to things I think they want, not what I want them to have.
Thanks everyone for letting me vent, which was only real purpose.

Since I do all the cooking for the T-day and Xmas gatherings we host them both. It is just too much stress trying to cook for 10-14 people in a strange kitchen and pantry. This year I had everything prepped by Wednesday afternoon for the T-day dinner. T-day morning other than place things in the ovens I just had to assemble the salad, carve the turkey, mash the potatoes and thicken the gravy. I make my gravy each year with the rendered stock from the preceding year. The roux is made the day before. Today I just finished freezing my stock for the gravy next year.

This year the hardiest thing was determining when to have the meals on the table. I never knew when to expect people to be back from shopping.

Unless you know my kitchen it would be a "hell" kitchen for anyone. My knives, pot, pans and utensils are a real hodgepodge. I like it that way. I have certain things I like to use for specific tasks. Plus, I have a basement full of larger pots and pans I use when cooking for for larger groups. I think my son is the only other cook who can survive using the setup without becoming totally stressed out. He knows my style and tastes so well.

Dale, I know your frustration, but it is not only the parents who do this. I cook at times in a family member’s home and go through the same thing. One time I commented on the potato peeler....she should throw it out and get a new one. The next time I cooked there, that same dull, falling apart peeler was still there. When we finished doing the dishes (Gene always does them) I asked him where the potato peeler was...he had not seen it, nor had I after I finished using it. OMG it was gone! So, I went to the kitchen store and bought a nice quality peeler, one I knew would be sharp and easy on the hands. The lady of the house was not happy with me.

So in regards to your parents: the fact that they are depression era says it all. I have found that people that went through that or had parents who did are very frugal with so many things. They also generally have money to spend and will buy furniture, lamps and things they want for the house. Unless they are true foodies, like all of us here, they are not going to spend money on kitchen gadgets (and that is what they think of them), while we all know that our kitchen tools are necessary not only for safety but ease of use. Gene used to make comments about the money I spent on a knife (he is an ex meat cutter?) or a small appliance, etc. I quickly pointed out that when he buys something for his workshop, he buys good quality, because it is a tool. I told him my cooking supplies where my tools, as well. He understood that and has since grown to appreciate the quality of things we have in our kitchen. Actually, every time I clean drawers, cupboards in my kitchen, I look at what I have. If it is broken, worn out, or unsafe, out it goes. So if I may offer this advice, because I am probably much older than you, when you go visit again, take your good knives, and do the best you can at mom and dad's house. Someday soon they won't be around. Now, I need to go take a look at some of my LOOK non-stick....one or two of them are looking a bit scary! Thanks for the prompt!

[Jenise]

Writing this from a friend's home in Anchorage, Alaska, in a house with a huge "gourmet" kitchen just six or seven years old: and no mixing bowls. Well, there's one: a plastic bowl lopsided from melting somewhat when left too close to the stove that's really too small to count. The paucity of this kitchen essential has really cramped my style here since I've been helping a lot in that department (I'm here to help during a family emergency), and it leads to the scary thought that no mixing of scratch ingredients ever gets done here.

Thing is, I know that my friend does cook for her family which consists of a husband, three kids currently away at college and two 11 year old who are becoming increasingly curious about helping out at meals. They've just returned from six years abroad on two foreign assignments, one of which included a cook; I have to think maybe that's where the bowls that everyone not just me needs. They just somehow got used up in a sense, and the hammer of the family emergency hit so soon after they got back (before, even, their shipment of household belongings had arrived) such that things have never returned to normal such that Laura could even take stock let alone get back to par. Anyway, tomorrow's her birthday, and four SS bowls in various sizes are my gift to her.

We have three grown children who have all been brought up with good food and wine and yet they are all pretty much happy with food on the Olive Garden level. I just want to point out it can work both ways. How did we go wrong raising them? We say something and they answer oh mom, dad, you're way too fussy.
Oh, I should inform everyone that they all can afford better.

There is nature and there is nurture....

There is nature and there is nurture....

Ah, and the trick is to get to the level, "where nature meets nuture", that is the nice spot.