by Hoke » Wed May 12, 2010 11:29 am
Well, if you're really going to emphasize farm-to-table dining, then maybe the restaurant should have a lot out back where you could chase down the chickens and wring their necks, drop them into scalding water, and pluck the feathers. You'd have to run the cattle through the chute, stun them with the pressure hammer (Thump!drops 'em in their tracks, man), haul them up on the hoist and cut their throats so they'll bleed out nicely, then cart them over to the butcher shop (keep the hides and offal and stuff, cause you can sell that to other industries, you know). Then right into the restaurant from the abbatoir and, voila, onto the table!
Might have a couple of problems with the cute little lambs, and veal calves and the bunny rabbits; the popularity on the menu might drop just a bit.
As part of their frequent diner program the restaurant could have, like, monogrammed mucking boots to keep the customers' feet from getting all muddy and stuff. Maybe some designer overalls or plastic suits in bright colors?
I'm betting this would be a major trendy hit in New York!!!