what kitchen rules do you consistently violate?

I am usually pretty good about following rules, but there's one I break all the time.
Whenever I have a bagel, I cradle it in the palm of my left hand, and cut it horizontally, with the knife heading right toward my palm. I use a serrated bread knife, so one false move and I will be on my way to the E.R. I always turn the bagel while cutting, maneuvering it so that the knife never gets within an inch or so of skin, but still........
I've heard that is the number one way people cut themselves in the kitchen, though I've never checked the veracity of that statistic.

Are there any safety codes, or other rules of thumb you routinely flout in your kitchen?

I keep about half the inventory of eggs and butter at room temperature so they are always the right temp for baking. If it's really, really hot I will put them in the fridge, but since I live in an actual adobe house, that rarely happens.

I was told a long time ago that when slicing anything round it's best to first cut a small piece off the edge so that it can rest flat while you cut. Of course, I never do that and so the round thing moves and I frequently slice a piece of my thumb instead.

I don't curly my fingers when slicing.

When there are multiple people in the kitchen I make sure that everyone knows where the others are. I say things like, "Behind you...Coming through...Hot pan." Should I have to move across the kitchen with my knife I always point my knife to the floor with the blade facing my back.

On the down side, depending on what I have been cutting, I will lick the blade of my chef's knife .

rwj

depending on what I have been cutting, I will lick the blade of my chef's knife

That's what I'm talking 'bout.

I say things like, "Behind you...Coming through...Hot pan."

That's just your restaurant background showing through. I do the very same thing.

And.... licking the chef's knife. Even I don't do that!

On the down side, depending on what I have been cutting, I will lick the blade of my chef's knife .

rwj

At a family breakfast once, I volunteered to do the pancakes. As I was preparing to send a stack out topped with real maple syrup, my mother-in-law caught me lick the syrup jar opening to catch that drop of maple that lingered.

She gave me a most conspiratorial look...

I say things like, "Behind you...Coming through...Hot pan."

That's just your restaurant background showing through. I do the very same thing.

And.... licking the chef's knife. Even I don't do that!

I find those kitchen rules are very handy. But for some reason I have picked up some really dangerous knife habits. I also do this thing when I have some down time in the kitchen or the lead chef is talking: I toss the knife in the air above my hand while giving it a spin. It twirls in the air about 5 times before I catch it. Why I do this and how I got started I'll never know. And if a plate is shaped in a nice oval I have this cool trick where I can flip it over my hand and catch it.

Thomas, I am sooooo guilty of 'licking the jar'.

rwj

[Jenise]

In my haste to get seasonings right, I forgetfully taste out of the pot using a spoon, not my finger. Now I always rinse the spoon afterward, but the point is I burn my tongue instead of my finger. I know better, but I just forget. Have a burnt tongue this morning, in fact.

A chef friend (now working in Savannah) did some kitchen demonstrations last decade. His specialty was creative sauces (like reduction sauces for meats and fish). These cook down considerably and resemble boiling syrups at the time. Routinely, while working on a sauce in his kitchen, he'd dip a finger into the boiling sauce to taste it.

I asked about this. When my parents taught basic cooking skills long ago, they stressed caution around boiling syrups.

This chef shrugged and said after a few years he'd lost feeling in that finger, so it worked fine.

Jenise wrote:

Now I always rinse the spoon afterward

Your supposed to rinse the spoon after you taste from it? I always figured any cooties would be killed by the hot temps.

I guess it is gross, huh? Thoughts, anyone?

It is unfair and bigoted of me to say this, but it doesn't bother me when it's a cute girl, but it does when it's an ugly old guy. Sort of like lipping the pipe back in the day.

Sort of like lipping the pipe back in the day.

Sorry. I don't catch your reference. I didn't realize you were employed in the plumbing trade.

I have no problem with someone double dipping the spoon - if it was someone I skeeved, I wouldn't be eating with them in the first place.

[Jenise]

You're supposed to rinse the spoon after you taste from it? I always figured any cooties would be killed by the hot temps.

Well, you're supposed to scrape the sauce from the wooden spoon with your finger, vs. eating off the spoon or dipping your finger directly in the sauce. The rinsing part is just what I do by force of habit out of some crazy fear of being a hypocrite, so soundly did I, little cootie warrior kid that I was, scream at mom or grandma for tasting from the spoon and putting it back in the pot. But I'm exactly like Stuart--had that been some cute guy I wouldn't have been concerned, but I was born convinced that germ exchange was sexual, and I didn't want to have sex with my mom, so....

WOW! You sure do learn a lot about people with a thread like this!!

Sort of like lipping the pipe back in the day.

Funny, neither plumbing nor dope was my first guess.

WOW! You sure do learn a lot about people with a thread like this!!

To be sure. We've gone from drugs to sex, anyone for some Rock 'N' Roll? Which, according to lore, is sex, since Alan Freed knew that in black slang down south at the time that's what rockin' an' rollin' meant to the Sixty Minute Man!

But I digress, I often cook with music going and, since I rarely follow a written recipe, I sometimes get wrapped in the music and forget an ingredient or two here and there...when I realize it, I might throw the ingredient in and mix things up just before serving, thinking "they'll never know..."

Alas, my wife always knows. Taught her well, I did.

Sort of like lipping the pipe back in the day.

Funny, neither plumbing nor dope was my first guess.

Now, you've got me wonderin' what is it your neighbors nicknamed you???

Taught her well, I did.

About the.... oh! The cooking, of course!

and I didn't want to have sex with my mom, so....

You didn't?

rwj

[Jenise]

You didn't?

Nope, Robert, most of us weren't like you....

Wow, people -- Jacqueline Suzanne should be very envious of all of you. Nobody could make this stuff up! Think I'll become a writer. Please -- keep talking.

You didn't?

Nope, Robert, most of us weren't like you....

You weren't?

Jo Ann, I've always wondered what it would be like to get us all in a room together. A room with a kitchen, a big table and a few beds. Now THAT would be a story!

rwj