Hey Robin! Are we a target?

If food-related places like an Amish popcorn factory and Dunkin Donuts can land on the government's terrorist target list, I was wondering if the FLDG is on it. And, if not, how can we get on the list?

[Robin Garr]

Larry, I would tread real carefully here. We've got so many liberals around that we might be a target OF Homeland Security ...

[James Roscoe]

Wouldn't that make you proud Robin? Sort of like being on Nixon's enemy list? I thought that was a badge of honor among liberals in the 70s? I guess these are darker times.

[David M. Bueker]

Larry, I would tread real carefully here. We've got so many liberals around that we might be a target OF Homeland Security ...

Liberals? Where? Probably a bunch of atheists too! (old-timers might get the joke...)

If food-related places like an Amish popcorn factory and Dunkin Donuts can land on the government's terrorist target list, I was wondering if the FLDG is on it. And, if not, how can we get on the list?

There are a lot of New England towns where bombing a Dunkin Donuts would wipe out the town's police force.

-Paul W.

[Robin Garr]

Wouldn't that make you proud Robin? Sort of like being on Nixon's enemy list? I thought that was a badge of honor among liberals in the 70s? I guess these are darker times.

Hell, the Fox media have pulled the center so far to the right since then that by today's standards, Nixon would be considered a dangerous leftie. Food stamps! Guaranteed annual wage! Anne Coulter would be shrieking for his assassination.

Paul, you just made me spit my lemonade on my keyboard.

B

[James Roscoe]

Hell, the Fox media have pulled the center so far to the right since then that by today's standards, Nixon would be considered a dangerous leftie. Food stamps! Guaranteed annual wage! Anne Coulter would be shrieking for his assassination.

But "You people" still have CNN, CBS, and NBC to balance everything out, not to mention that big fat guy who makes all those bad propoganda movies. (don't go talkin' smack about the anorexic beauty queen of the ragin' right)

[David M. Bueker]

Alas for a celebrity death match between the fat guy and the anorexic beauty queen...

[James Roscoe]

Alas for a celebrity death match between the fat guy and the anorexic beauty queen...

My initial reaction is that I'd pay money to see that! Unfortunately, it would just degenerate into a couple of twelve year olds pushing and shoving each other. Wait a second, the story line could get good.... Through in some mud, ripped clothes, ..... Bad visual coming up!

Hey, what about conservative atheists? We're people, too. Someone has to keep an eye on us...

[James Roscoe]

Hey, what about conservative atheists? We're people, too. Someone has to keep an eye on us...

I'm an athiest when it comes to athiests.

[Jenise]

Hey, what about conservative atheists? We're people, too.

Not in George Bush's base, you're not. Not too late to join the other team!

Hey, what about conservative atheists? We're people, too.

Not in George Bush's base, you're not. Not too late to join the other team!

The other team hates me more.

[David M. Bueker]

Hey, what about conservative atheists? We're people, too. Someone has to keep an eye on us...

Not quite convinced that liberals exist?

Sadly, I'm quite convinced of it.

I'm a niche.

Hey, what about conservative atheists? We're people, too. Someone has to keep an eye on us...

I'm an athiest when it comes to athiests.

Wouldn't that be aatheist?

Interestingly enough, the KY Bourbon Festival was placed on the list of possible terrorist targets. That I understand! We need a cabinet level agency to guard our beloved wine and spirits!

Interestingly enough, the KY Bourbon Festival was placed on the list of possible terrorist targets. That I understand! We need a cabinet level agency to guard our beloved wine and spirits!

While we're on this topic...

I have received personal attention from and personal correspondence from the Department of Homeland Security. So, in case you wonder how your taxes are being spent by those who are protecting our well-being, let me clue you in.

I had a seizure - no, not that kind! I was endangering the country by ordering a carton of cigarettes from Andorra. (Never mind why - not relevant here.) I received a letter from the Department of Homeland Security saying they had seized my carton of cigarettes. I was instructed that I would need to fill out certain forms available from any of their offices and pay the duty on the carton of cigarettes and then I could have them. Or, alternatively, I could just forfeit them. I saved you a bunch of money by forfeiting them.

My first thought is how much did it cost for someone to monitor this, ferret out the offending carton, sieze it, warehouse it, pass along this information to another office where this letter was composed and passed along to a superior for approval, I'm sure, and then send it to me?

And here you thought the Department was not doing its job protecting you!


So, don't be afraid, there's not a snowball's chance in hell of a dangerous $13.00 carton of cigarettes attacking you.

Phew! I can finally start sleeping again, now that I don't have to worry about Andorran cigarettes sneaking into the country. What a relief!

I was instructed that I would need to fill out certain forms available from any of their offices and pay the duty on the carton of cigarettes and then I could have them.

Last year, for Xmas, I imported a couple kilos of giandujotti from Torino. In preparation for this momentous chocolate-and-hazelnut event, I filled out numerous forms on the FDA website relating to the terms and conditions of the Bio-Terrorism Act of 2002. I was on a first-name basis with the lovely woman (Yvette) who offers public guidance there. (Are these "chocolate with nuts" or "chocolate and nuts"?)

I also had to persuade the owner of the shop that it really was possible to ship chocolate to the US anymore... I just had to do a bunch of paperwork in advance. And send him some of them, which he had to put on the goods. And on the outside of the box. And give a couple to his local UPS....

Fortunately, I really really like these giandujotti, so the labor was worth it.

But just barely.

If food-related places like an Amish popcorn factory and Dunkin Donuts can land on the government's terrorist target list, I was wondering if the FLDG is on it. And, if not, how can we get on the list?

Keep promoting screw caps.


Liberal and proud of it.