WTN: Nightmares & Dream Flights

[David M. Bueker]

This past Thursday I flew back from Torino. Up at 4 AM to get to the airport for my early flight (Torino to Paris then Paris to JFK). I was very groggy until the cab driver started pushing 160 kph on the motorway.

Air France to Paris short and uneventful, but then the fun of Charles De Gaulle airport begins. For those who have not been there lately, there's a lot of landing at remote terminals, being bused back to the main terminal, then more security checks, then being bused back to another (or sometimes the same) remote terminal. Aaaaarrrrrrggghhhh!

But this time was even better. After arriving at the new terminal 2E, we were ushered downstairs, outside the secure area & told to stay right where we were, all 2000 or so of us. Seems someone had left a piece of carry-on luggage in the terminal & it had to be treated as a bomb. What fun. Is there a bathroom down here somewhere? No?!?!? Uh, ok. Luckily it was only about a 30 minute delay, but then it was like festival seating trying to get back to security. My business companion got pushed pretty badly. I got kicked (nice bruise) & whatever tolerance I had for my fellow man was wiped out by the hordes pushing, yelling, screaming, kicking, etc. to get to the stairs first. We just stayed mostly to the sidelines & let the mob push us where they would. One person pushed over a security guard & was hauled away, yelling every step of the way. All this because some dumb&*(^%@#$ left their carry-on bag.

Anyway, we finally got on the plane & settled into our business class seats. Due to the security issue our takeoff was delayed to allow all the people to get to the plane. I fell asleep in my seat, but was awakened by not one, not two, but three flight attendants. I was groggy & they were speaking French, so I am sure I looked totally bewildered. They switched to English & told me I had been upgraded to 1st class! Hmm, isn't that just horrid.

Anyway, this is when it got good. First class on Air France is beyond plush. The seats that covert to beds, the pajamas & slippers, the single flight attendant for just four passengers all make for a nice start. Then there was the food and wine. I tried my best to sample everything:

1995 Henriot Cuvee des Enchantelleures Champagne
Gently frothy with apple fruit and an appealing smoky note. Quite nice with my amuse bouche of assorted small bites (salmon with parsley, a brochette of pineapple, feta & smked duck, etc.)

2005 Maison Ropiteau Puligny-Montrachet Le Trezin
Nutty with citrus zest. Wood comes out more with air. Not bad, but too woody for my taste. Worked reasonably well with my appetizer of sea breem (didn't he play for the Braves in the early '90s?) with a tomato and grain mustard reduction.

2005 Jean-Claude Boisset Santenay Grand Clos Rousseau
Boisterous fruit (cherry, dark berry) with subtle oak. Something about the few 2005 Burgs I have tried reminds me very much of the 2005 Beaujolais. Perhaps it's the exuberant fruit, but at the lower level (where 2005 is supposed to be some great success) I just don't see the reason to pay the upcharge to Burgundy from Beaujolais to get the same punchy fruit with almost no tannin. Anyway, this wasn't bad with my chicken entree. (An aside - has there ever been a vegetable on an airline flight that wasn't so overcooked your could whip it into baby food?)

Then came the cheese cart. Not a cheese plate, but a cart, filled with several choices of true, French, unpateurized cheeses. What an opportunity. I had several, along with a glass of pure nectar:

1997 Chateau Suduiraut Sauternes
Wave after wave of honey, nuts, citrus peel, orange & almond paste that was just too easy to drink. It was a lovely accompaniment to the cheese & I'm sad to say I was the only one of the four people to drink any of it. I could have drank all of it. A lovely example of Sauternes.

Then there were some forgettable desserts, but a very nice coffeee service, a nap in a "real" bed & a feeling of complete refreshment after arriving at JFK (quickly trounced by a traffic jam on the Van Wyck "Expressway").

I could never afford to travel like this on a regular basis, but on Air France's dime I will do it any time.

By the way, what's up with US Customs? The last two times I have come in from Europe there have been zero questions, no little dogs sniffing luggage for illicit cheese/sausages & not even a review of my customs declaration form. I know I am a pretty vanilla character, but it was the same for everyone in the US Passport line. I don't mind getting through so quickly, but wow.

. . . but then the fun of Charles De Gaulle airport begins. . . Aaaaarrrrrrggghhhh!

You ain't kidding. Two years ago, CDG provided the worst airport experience of my life. I will happily pay more for a longer trip to avoid it in the future. Sounds like you got a sweet upgrade, though!

Wow, lucky for the upgrade! Wonder what tourist wine was like? Flying Delta I tried the tourist "wine" both on flight to Paris and flight Nice to Paris. Wine on way over was revolting- a Merlot from Fisheye, based in Ripon CA (Betsy is a CA girls and never heard of, but we assumed along I-5). On return,
as Delta is an Air France partner flying out of their terminal in Nice, with employee sharing, I hoped wine might be better. It was, because I ordered the white- the Fisheye Pinot Grigio was a C- on my scale, as the Merlot had been a D. Food was marginally better.

a traffic jam on the Van Wyck "Expressway").

Hee hee, calling the VW an Expressway is just NYC's little joke (I don't find funny, having driven from JFK 3 times in last month)

By the way, what's up with US Customs? The last two times I have come in from Europe there have been zero questions, no little dogs sniffing luggage for illicit cheese/sausages & not even a review of my customs declaration form. I know I am a pretty vanilla character, but it was the same for everyone in the US Passport line. I don't mind getting through so quickly, but wow.

When we came through, just quick scan of form at entrance, and there was a dog briefly at baggage (but not when we had gotten bags). My guess is concentrating more on sniffing real baggage.

I will say the no line was a relief after Paris. When we arrived, they bussed us to another terminal for EU entry. 3 windows, 1 EU only. About 700 people (mulitple flights). They had 5 feet of little ribbons on post separating "lines". So just a huge mob pushing towards windows.

David, we had an identical experience clearing U.S. customs returning in June '01. Don't know if there is/was any connection with what happened two months later, but you never can tell. Sounds like no changes have been made.

Cheers,
Carl

[James Roscoe]

By the way, what's up with US Customs? The last two times I have come in from Europe there have been zero questions, no little dogs sniffing luggage for illicit cheese/sausages & not even a review of my customs declaration form. I know I am a pretty vanilla character, but it was the same for everyone in the US Passport line. I don't mind getting through so quickly, but wow.

Why hassle the white guy when there are plenty of people of color to hassle? When did a white guy blow up a building? (How quickly people forget Oklahoma City.) Sheez. It may not be racially motivated, but it makes you wonder.

I know when my wife and I crossed the Canadian border at Niagara in June we had no problems, but the nice-looking young Asian family seemed to be really hassled by the Canadian people and other people of color had more difficulty when we got back to the U.S. side. Jeannette, John F., and I just showed our driver's ID and passed by.

Congrats on the upgrade David! Was even the Sauternes free?

[David M. Bueker]

Indeed the Sauternes was free!!!

[David M. Bueker]

Why hassle the white guy when there are plenty of people of color to hassle? When did a white guy blow up a building?

James,

Note that it was the exact same for everyone in the US Passport line.

[James Roscoe]

Why hassle the white guy when there are plenty of people of color to hassle? When did a white guy blow up a building?

James,

Note that it was the exact same for everyone in the US Passport line.

That is at least comforting. The hassles I saw the Asians getting at the Canadian in Niagara border by both American and Canadian border police made me a little uneasy. It was obvious that not all were being treated equally.

There was a great scene in Family Guy where Stewie is working at a security check in an Airport and letting the Johnny Quest characters through for their flight. When it get's to Hadji, Stewie suddenly says "I'm sorry, you've been selected for random screening." Hadji looks at Stewie and yells "Sim! Sim! Salabim!" and Stewie responds, "Yeeeeeaaaaah... I'd be trying to cut back on that..."

Funny stuff, though maybe you had to be there

There was a great scene in Family Guy where Stewie is working at a security check in an Airport and letting the Johnny Quest characters through for their flight. When it get's to Hadji, Stewie suddenly says "I'm sorry, you've been selected for random screening." Hadji looks at Stewie and yells "Sim! Sim! Salabim!" and Stewie responds, "Yeeeeeaaaaah... I'd be trying to cut back on that..."

Funny stuff, though maybe you had to be there

That scene had me falling out of my chair. I don't watch a lot of TV, but Stewie is by far my favorite character on any show these days.

[David M. Bueker]

Stewie rocks!

[Jenise]

The hassles I saw the Asians getting at the Canadian in Niagara border by both American and Canadian border police made me a little uneasy. It was obvious that not all were being treated equally.

James, I live just a few miles from the Canadian border and cross over the border frequently--I have a lot of Canadian friends, and there are better restaurants closer to me on their side than on mine. I go up 2-3 times a month. And because I am a frequent crosser and resident, and not because I'm white, most of the time I am waved on after being asked a routine question or three. But in spite of the fact that I am a local resident and a frequent crosser, I am sometimes inexplicably treated in a way that feels quite hostile--never by the Canadians going up, mind you, but when returning, by our guys. I have twice been removed from my car and sent into a building while they searched my car. A few times I've been asked to remove my keys and hand them to the border agent, ostensibly to prevent me fleeing while he does a closer inspection. I've been questioned in detail--not once, but four times now--about my ability to afford one of my cars. Twice I've had to drive to an inspection area and go sit in a building while they searched further. I also have friends, white and non-white, who also cross frequently. Their experiences mirror mine. And I have to say that, where it's obvious from things I've read that in the U.S. some racial profiling does take place, my personal experience does not bear witness to the notion that white people are treated better than anyone else.

Rather, if your paperwork isn't in order, you'll get hassled. If everybody in the car doesn't have an actual passport, you'll get hassled. If your body language somehow isn't right, you'll get hassled. If you appear to dislike being questioned, you'll get hassled. If the guy just woke up in the mood to amuse himself by jerking people around, you'll get hassled. One exciting time nine agents poured out of the building and surrounded the car in front of me, guns drawn, and removed the occupants one by one at gunpoint. And all I can say is, it's almost never apparent why I or any one else was selected for whatever treatment we got, so I would caution you against seeing someone of another race getting hassled and presuming that race alone was the cause. I wouldn't.

And now David back to you--getting upgraded is almost better than winning the lottery. And on an Air France international flight no less--you are a lucky man.

[David M. Bueker]

I've only ever been hassled by the border patrol once & that was on 9/13/01 as Laura and I were leaving the USA. I pretty much expected it. The "best" part about that grilling was when one of the officers turned out to be from my area & started asking questions to trip me up. I ended up having to correct her a few times with detailed addresses of businesses she "remembered." I was being set up, but luckily I kept my cool and had enough detail information to get through it. This was at a very quiet, backwater crossing & I think the officers were all just really pissed off because of 9/11 and looking for something to do so that they would feel like they were contributing.

Then we went literally 40 feet north & the Canadians did the exact same search, complete with gunpoint.